10.22.06
The Birth of My Babies
About three years ago I read a book called, A Baby Catcher, Chronicles of a Modern MidWife, by Peggy Vincent. The book has story after story of home births. I never tire of hearing birth stories. Since I had my youngest son at home with a midwife, I could really appreciate these stories. I loved them, and could barely put the book down.
Tonight, I was visiting Samuel’s website, and noticed that I never checked out the “About Us” section. So I did and there I found that Jen had all four of her babies at home, AND she had each of their birth stories right there to read! Was I thrilled to read them, and it brought back my own memories of delivering my children. You’ve inspired me, Jen, to share my stories. . .
My first two babies were delivered in the hospital. My first one was Andrew, and he was delivered 3 weeks early. It was a very hot month, and my mom and I split a whole watermelon. Not long after that, I started to have “tummy pains.” I had no idea I was in labor. I just felt uncomfortable all day. By the evening I noticed these tummy pains were “regular.” Ha ha! Hmm. Why is that? Well being the shy person that I am, I didn’t want to “bother” anyone, so I suffered through the night with them until morning when I finally decided to tell my husband that I think I’m having labor pains. We ended up getting to the hospital around 8 AM. I was a very “quiet” laborer. . . The nurse would pop her head in the door and check me out and say she couldn’t believe how quiet I was and that other women at this stage are usually screaming. Well, I did feel terrible, but I was not going to be screaming. . . and by 12 noon, I was ready to pop. They then wheeled me into the delivery room, where the nurse leaned into me and said, “Stop pushing!” What?!!! Who’s pushing? This thing wants out, and I’m not doing anything! I guess I was still very quiet, but my lips were moving. My nurse noticed this, and came up right in my face and asked, “What is it, Honey? What are you saying?” The words I “whispered” back to her were, “Help me!” Ha, ha, ha! Well, seeing that I had no control, I heard the nurse yell out to get Dr. Thompson, the doctor on call. That’s when it hit me that there was no doctor around! Ack! But at that very moment, my doctor flew into the room and said, “Let’s give you more room. . . ” He did, and the next minute, Andrew shot right out. The pain was immediately gone. I did not know at the time if I was having a girl or a boy, but it didn’t matter. They placed him right on my chest. I could feel his weight and warmth, and his eyes twinkled as he looked right into my eyes, blinking with his long, wet eyelashes. He was absolutely beautiful.
Matthew’s delivery was just as quick as Andrew’s, but more painful. Since I didn’t take any meds for Andrew’s delivery, I thought I could do it again with this one. This time my doctor was off, and there was the doctor on call. When I started labor, he asked me what my labor felt like the first time, to which I replied, “Gas.” LOL He said, “Alrighty, then, come right in.” This time I was at the hospital at around 9AM. The doc on call asked me if I wanted to do this naturally, to which I said, “Yes.” And he was off. . . to let me go naturally. . . Little did I know that meant no episiotomy! After a lot of back labor, I finally was ready to deliver around 1PM. I pushed like crazy until Matthew squeezed out, sunnyside up screaming to high heaven. Not only did he scream like a rock star, but Brian said he had a tongue that could rival Gene Simmons of KISS , ha ha! If that wasn’t enough, I was shocked that he was a boy. Everything about this pregnancy was different even to the point of a faster heartbeat, which my doc told me likely means a girl. . . The shocked look on my face of having a baby boy plopped on my belly provoked a puzzled look from the doctor on call. He had no idea I thought I was having a girl. This one is fresh out of the oven, so it’s really yours. . . ha! But that was soon straightened out as his amazing form won me over in an instant. I loved that I had another boy.
Well, I had done it, twice without an epidural, and this time without an episiotomy. To my surprise, recovery was so much easier! I was amazed at the difference in recovery between having an episiotomy and not having one even though I did tear a little. Not having an episiotomy was so much easier afterwards! I was amazed at how normal I felt the next day! That’s when I realized that an episiotomy wasn’t normal. Pregnancy is a normal condition, not a sickness. Why should childbirth be done in a hospital, which is for sick people? That set the stage for my next child birth, which we chose to have at home with a midwife.
Last, but not least, was the birth of my youngest son, Aaron. Since the doctors didn’t do much at all for my first two deliveries (they basically “caught” my babies only after arriving at the very last minute), we figured I was ready to try a home birth. I’ll say, I am so happy that I did. As usual, I don’t like to bother people at night. When I got home that evening, I was changing my clothes and caught sight of my figure in the long view mirror. My belly looked different. . . uh, kinda low. . . ha ha! But silly me, I didn’t think much of it. So into bed I went, and very early in the morning I “heard” a “snap” sound! What was that?! I got up to use the restroom, and I was leaking. I guess my water bag popped on its own. I called the midwife to let her know, but since she was at another birth, she sent her assistant to check me out. She wanted to make sure that I didn’t have some sort of infection that would cause the bag to break. The fluid that was coming out was not murky, which was a good sign. Murky, dirty fluid could mean the baby was in stress and releasing muconium. But that was not the case, so since I wasn’t feeling any contractions, I whipped up breakfast–homemade belgium waffles, bacon, homemade whipped cream with maple syrup, ummm!!! I was so glad that midwives don’t mind eating! After breakfast my midwife, Leslie, arrived, and we all hung out for a while. Nothing much was happening except an occasional contraction. I was starting to dilate a little, but it was getting close to noon, so my midwife said, “shall we speed this up a bit?” She offered me some drink, and since I had no knowledge of anything medical or anything about health foods or anything else for that matter, I drank it. I still don’t know what it is. Ha! She said it was some natural something-or-other to help speed up contractions. And boy, oh boy was she right! In about half an hour I was in hard labor. I was my usual quiet self, but really appreciated that they let you labor in “any” position you wanted with no wires, I.V’s, or monitors to make the whole experience even that much more uncomfortable. I was on my left side. As Aaron’s head started to make an appearance, I heard the assistant midwife say that she had the mirror out. I didn’t realise that she had it set up so that I could see my son being born. It was so painful that I had my eyes closed the whole time! In retrospect, I realize what a shame that was! Fortunately, my midwife’s assistant had the presence of mind to take photographs, so today I’m blessed to have those by which to remember the event. My third son was placed on my belly just like his brothers had been when they were born, only this time Brian was allowed to cut the umbilical cord. But no matter how many times you deliver a baby, that very first moment that they’re placed on your belly is such an awesome moment. It’s always like the first time. The sheer joy of seeing and touching your child for the first time is thrilling, an experience unlike any other. A moment in life that I’m happy that God made me female.
Receiving a vit K dose. Not an injection, just using the syringe without a needle.
Aaron Brown, March 1, 1994
Marlakins 
Andrea said,
October 23, 2006 at 1:14 pm
Hi marla–Great to read your stories. My dil Debbie told me about Babycatcher, a book she and my son both loved, and I did too. My son, however, thought it especially sad that she had to quit her practice because of the lawsuit.
Your births sound wonderful and so carefree! I think the drink you were given was Blue Cohosh, or maybe Black Cohosh. My midwife tried it on me with my third, but it didn’t work. So she broke my water. That REALLY worked–Annie popped out 45 minutes later! (I had been at 4cm for a day and a half.)
With Tom, my water broke early on, and it was murky, but the midwives didn’t transport me to the hospital because I was 9cm. His head was huge and I had to push like anything–then before he took a breath they suctioned him so he wouldn’t inhale any yucky stuff. And he was fine. Still is!
My oldest was cesarean. I had a pitocin drip, a monitor, a pressure catheter, gargantuan contractions, demerol–and still stayed at 4 cm. I had the urge to push, big time, but they insisted I not push (which was incredibly hard) because of the 4cm. I’ve always wondered what would have happened if I had pushed! I can’t believe my body could possibly be so wrong.
I had a VBAC in the hospital with a midwife with my second. It was a nightmare. Not the labor–that was very smooth, but because I wasn’t following their schedule, I was constantly pressured to accept a monitor, a pressure catheter, pitocin. I had done my homework, and refused, and then the midwife called in the doctor, who came in with the air of a bad cop who was going to set me straight and told me I was endangering my baby! Rob got so mad at him I thought they were going to get in a fist fight! (They didn’t.) When I persisted in refusing the above (the pitocin especially being a definite risk to the scar), he walked out and stopped sending nurses to monitor the baby!!! Yikes!! After an hour or so, Rob went out and got a nurse who started coming in to listen to Laura. Now that I wasn’t arguing with people, I really started cooking and in an hour and a half I was 9cm. Laura was easy to push out and so beautiful and I was so happy, but the hospital situation was so horrible, with everyone yelling at me, that for Annie and Tom, I chose being home. It was wonderful.
Those are my stories!! Andrea
Administrator said,
October 24, 2006 at 12:57 pm
Hey Andrea! Thanks for sharing your birthing stories! How fun! That’s interesting that you had a VBAC. I know that some midwives won’t take VBACs. I’ll look into the Black or Blue Cohosh. I bet that was what it was.
Your story with the pitocin reminded me of a discussion we were having at work when I became pregnant with my first son. You know how it is everyone starts telling about their experiences. I love that. Ha! But, one lady said they were talking about her labor and how they used “pitocin.” Well one of their little ones was in the room listening to them and asked, “Why did they ‘put toast in’?” Ha ha ha ha!
Yeah, I felt it was a shame, too, that Vincent had to stop her midwifing because of that lawsuit. If the story is really the way she described it, then it really wasn’t her fault. I think midwives really help to make the whole pregnancy and birthing thing easier. They gave me tips that my docs never did like telling me to walk more and towards the end of my term, my midwife told me to do those cat arches to make sure the my baby wasn’t facing the wrong way when he was born. My second was facing the wrong way and that was why I had so much back labor. Basically the back of his head was pressing on my tailbone and when we was born he came out facing up. They supposedly should come out facing down, IIRC, and then turn as they come out which doesn’t cause that back pain. So the cat arches helps to turn the baby cuz their backs weigh more and while you arch it helps them to turn over. Anyway, Aaron came out the right way, so the arches may really have helped. Can’t say for sure, tho. Also, they used warm cloths over the area while I was having contractions. That helped to relax the muscles and allow more ease with my skin to stretch. They never did anything like that in the hospital. The home birth was just overall a such better experience. If I were to do it again, I would probably try the underwater births, too. But at the time my bathroom was too tiny. Ha ha!
Aren’t you glad the men were there to help keep us drugless? Ha ha! Brian did the same for me at the hospital. There was a lot of pain, and it was hard to speak. Brian spoke for me. They asked if I wanted the epidural, and before I could say anything, Brian said, “No, she doesn’t.” Ha ha! If I were by myself, I might have broken down with the pain and said, “Sure!” Only to regret it later. So I am thankful.
Alrighty! Thanks again, Andrea!
Marla
Patti said,
October 24, 2006 at 11:43 pm
I LOVE birth stories and these are so neat. I always wanted a home birth but hubba said “no way, too messy!” hee But I do feel blessed that we got connected to good birthing classes. We used Bradley’s husband coached childbirth and my husband did a great job! They warned us in class that we were going to ask for drugs when going through transition. They told us just to count on it and it was up to the husbands to walk us through that few minutes. And it really was just a few short minutes for me. He was great with the first especially and good with the second but the third – well, I think he was thinking he was about done by then! She was such a hard pregnancy and the birth was so dramatic (almost dropped her on the hallway floor at home – 90 miles an hour in an ambulance) that when I got to the asking for drugs part he gave in and told them to give me whatever I wanted! Thankfully I was able to say no! To this day he tells me that the one part he didn’t like is that while he was trying to talk me through that part the nurses looked at him like he was a real jerk. I can kind of understand that these days considering the whole feminist movement thing and everyone always seems to use drugs. That particular day I had 5 docs/nurses in the room because of baby difficulties and he was really feeling like they thought he was just a class one jerk. The other times it was just my doc (who knew what we wanted and the nurse who had read my birthplan). But boy, I’m glad they didn’t give me anything! I cannot imagine a drugged childbirth. I never even let them give me a heparin lock. With the last one they were prepping me for a c-section. They put a heparin lock in towards the end of my labor. Took some serious time on my hands and knees to get her to drop but it worked. In class they had also always told us that if the baby was really in danger they would knock you out and do a c-section so to try and work through whatever the issue was first. I am so glad we worked through this one because the only problem was her cord was sooooo long that it was complicating things. My doctor held up a more then 3ft long cord after she was born. They were all very impressed! No wonder I had so much trouble with her heart (cord was around her neck 3 times) and no wonder I got soooo big with my Peanut (she was 8lbs 10oz – my smallest). That whole pregnancy was just difficult. Pancreatitis at 13 weeks, then gestational diabetes because of the pancreatitis, 3 ultrasounds a week that last 3-4 weeks because of fluid/heartbeat issues. Oy, it was a hard pregnancy. And still recovering 5yrs later!
With my Peanut she just didn’t want to drop. I was already at 9 or so. I have to say, I was incredibly embarrassed to be bear behinded on my hands and knees with my doc, an ob-gyn, anestheiologist (sp?) and a nurse in the room! They say you don’t get embarrassed during labor – not that time! I was.
I will encourage my girls to do homebirths and also do the bradley method because it works so well. I would love to teach bradley classes. Hubby says no way, he’s seen enough!
Not like I have the time….
I think birth stories are so fun. Thanks for sharing yours, ladies. It brightened my night.
Patti